I hope that even if the UK decided to leave the EU, our neighbours would not annex our garden overnight, spray paint "Scandis go home!" on our house and then nationalise the property altogether to turn it into a memorial of suffering endured by Londoners under the EU's free movement of labour.
Anyway, we are prepared to flee to the closest Ikea for temporary shelter in case violence and pogroms break out in Chelsea after the vote.
BBC is asking Should EU citizens consider becoming British?